A Letter Full of Things I Wish I Said To Deceased Loved Ones While I Had The Chance
Yo, get up. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. You aren’t just your worst enemy, you just might be your only worthy opponent. I love you but I won’t watch you give up, not after all the shit you’ve given me for trying, actively and openly — even if we’d both be justified for opting all the way out. That’s called quitting, forfeiting…losing. I know neither of us are good with that, so let’s go…
Once again I love you, now get TF up.
Talk to me, calm down, breathe. Tell me what happened. Okay, I get it. But this rage is killing you. This can be worked through, talked through, you need to talk to someone, if only me. Probably more than me though. I love you, don’t give up, we need you. You got this and we got you. Let it all go…
You need help and you have people that want to help you — if you want it. You're grown, nobody can or will force you to do anything you don’t want to or won’t. We’re here, you know that. You avoid us because you blame us.
Thank you. For everything, you’ve ever done for me and everyone as a whole, even if I never said it or couldn’t see it at the time. You showed me what true bravery and courage were. I loved you like family because as far as I’m concerned, your family will always be family to me, no matter what.
You annoyed and irked me like only someone I loved as much I loved you — every last one of you — possibly could, and I could not possibly be more grateful for being blessed with someone as real as you in my life, for most of it, at that.
You made me who I am, you helped mold me from the time I could hardly walk and definitely didn’t talk right. You were the coolest person I knew and it was hard not to laugh when you were around, you saw to it. You preferred to smile through the bullshit cause your smile lit up a room and tended to cut through the negativity and nonsense. Fake usually didn’t stand a chance around you and I fucking love you for that.
I could go on forever but I know I don’t have to because though you are all gone, I know in a way you’ll be with me forever, however long that may be for me personally anyway. I live for, love, and miss you all very much, thank you.