After a tough but necessary conversation with a loved one days ago, I spent my weekend mainly reflecting, not just on what was said, and how I felt about it but, on alot more as well.
I thought about friends I once considered as close as family, that I haven’t seen in years, and for the life of me I can’t wrap my mind around how we let ourselves grow apart or life get in the way of the friendship. In a way, I mourned those friendships while still remembering all of the good about them. They were times and people I’ll never forget, and I truly do love each and every one of you. Even if it’ll always be from a distance, from here on out.
Because the truth is, I’m difficult. I was going to use the word complex but that’s often just disguising the word asshole. I’ll settle for complex asshole. It’s ashame my love for the people I care about hasn’t seemed to be able to make me any less difficult, hard headed or stubborn. Just know that’s not an indication I love any of you, any less.
I’m writing this, in hopes as many people that actually know me will read it, because I’m out of ways of trying to say it all to all of you individually, in a way you’ll understand. Honestly, sometimes I become resentful I even have to at this point, but that’s on me.
It’d be fair to say, that for one reason or another, I’ve lost SO many of the relationships that…
