Using The Threat Of Voting For Trump To My Advantage in Everyday Life Situations, Personally, Politicically, Professionally and Patriarchiachally

Pussy grabbers, stand down and stand by, Toxic Masculinitity militia, — we litty again so getcha popcorn ready. Or better yet, make her do it.

Dirty Brandon voting democrats who can’t tell dementia from depletion of all functional motor skills are killing me. They can’t be serious, can they? I’ve had biological blood relatives light years younger than Biden we decided as a family, we’d do them the kindness of comforting them with a death we found timely, that didn’t fuck with anyone’s schedule or inconvenience the living and reasonably healthy. Those of us with a bare minimum of say twenty five summers left, at least. `Yolo, so yeah, clear your calendar sometime between Tuesday and Thursday before The Apprentice rerun airs on The Dog Shit Network until either They Lock her up or Fauci makes the top of the FBI’s most wanted list for his wars against insanity. Science bores me to no end, it’s like statistics or foreign policy. I;ve got a golf score to persistently somehow make worse everytime I plunder out for as long as humanely possib;le until the Florida Sun turns my skin prune like.

If Eminem doesn’t drop his latest album by July first, I swear to Christ I’ll vote for that vagina vice grip of a human who never made valedictorian. A layereredly dark, complex man who may or may not have convinced his own brother to hang it up, literally. More presents for Donnie come December is all he could really see it resulting in. What’s a little siblingly suicide compared to ten plus years of being spoiled by Santa. It was a percentage thing,he always was a numbers guy. Except when it comes to things like polls, votes, and basic arithmatic. He graduated from Cambridge with a certificate in convoluted conspiracies that served exclusively his own self interest. His father paid off several professors, pretty openly to be honest.

But what if Biden Dies mid inauguration from all the excitement and then next thing you know we got Beyonce’s Aunt Brownie running the country like it’s the BET awards rehearsal dinner., and not the Good old U, S of Awesome. Tiffany Haddish could end up in this great nation’s war cabinet. Which is wild because in the 90’s she was homeless. She slept in cabinets some nights.

Jay Z will never cut his hair. There’s no way that’s beneficial to the environment, his sheets or the state of hip hop as we know it.

Colin Kaepernick will never stand again, do you understand what I’m blatantly and disparaningly overstating to you in a mannert not unsimilar to your go to “news channel”. If they’ve ever uttered the word Kardashian, they’re an entertainment conglomerate not a fucking news outlet. Unless by chance, it perhaps had the word Robert before it, back when you could still say gay in public and not worry about starving in the streets helplessly as homos and homies threw ham sandwiches at you.

I think you get my point, things are gonna start changing around here or else. Ill do everything in my power to dump you with a Trump after just a couple of pumps. I demand to pick the next actor that plays Batman and be granted special permission to serve on the federal Jury of Puff Daddy’s now infamous rape and red tape case.

If you people see me coming, cross the street or I’ll buy a Make America a Little less horrible hat that’s made in China for less than you want to know about. One an American could’ve easily made, if he was willing to work for pennies and pacos and pepperoni hot pockets a quarterly period of the year like Pablo from that Bando looking building they try and pass off as a plant to the Pacific Islanders. I don’t think Pablo’s gone home all Spring, to be honest. Good man, if he could just get the language down a little more lenienently, we’d have ourselves quite the indentured Dominican looking servant. And you know how hot they like their Jalapanos Compadre’.

King of the The Plant, yeah, okay right — maybe if it was built in the projects by people who lived in, on and around said projects and all the other puerto rick-an and Pablo Escobar inspired statues as well as scarface shaped sculptures and other indecent intricacies of our great, great nation the Latinos clearly enjoy. Poverty stricken areas cops shouldn’t be burdened with bothering with, lets just give the things that still basically qualify as houses or atlease semi stable structures to all the Spaniards and Libtards. Nancy Pelosi can run for Old bag of the Old State I never wanted to run anyway because it smells of gays and equal rights for women and me that those who are terrified of the trans community often say woah-man, when we see in public. . I have no doubt she’ll win, unchallenged unless Hillary isn’t tired of running from the Feds and has yet another sad, sorry excuse of a camapign in her to jog out before she clocks out and is thrown out at first base again, by a mile.

Seriously America, don’t make me do it. Be reasonable and comply, if you know what’s good, old, boring and aging for you.

Like this story, share it, Pay me for it, Buy me Coffee, and krimpets, the jelly kind. Share it on X and Twitter. Fuck you pay me, or I’ll make sure my vote not only counts, but counts us out of contyention of contriest with the most stable and sane leadership, for the foreseeable future, and fuck it maybe even beyond, we’ll see if he feels like leaving come 2028.

I’m warning you, don’t make me fucking do it. Just drop a like, comment and share, and I assure you, we can back to boring Biden Business as usual.

Don’t make me bring up the Hunter Biden Trial at Chuannakauh, it’d be completely inappropriate considering it’d be after the election and I’m not even Jewish. I’m a blind Jehovahs witness who likes reality Tv like CNN and Fox and friends, ironically, my only real friend, is what I’ve gathered has to be a fox or rabid cat of sorts. Either that or it’s Chief Justice Roberts, he’s like a puppy whom pees all over the house.

Let me go mail in my ballots now, counted 8 last time I checked. That oughta’ get the deal done, one way or another. Cghoose carefully, worldwiode democracy might just depend on it, losers. Sometimes I scribble addresses to sloppy when I jot em’. I should really watch that nonsense, that probably could cause a lot of problems.

You’re friendly freedom fighting ferret loving fentanyl addicted food stamp fan, Franny The Roofer.