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Now, I didn’t necessarily mean to compare Medium’s new applause system to a venereal disease, I’m all about fair chances.

However, I can easily see it spinning out of control quickly. In fact it may have already.

While I’m all about giving each and every writer here and elsewhere a fair chance at exposure, I see this system becoming a stat padding tool for every Barry Bonds on Medium. Pretty soon we will have to start putting asterisks next to articles with 1k+ claps just to clarify that no — 1,000 people did not find that article interesting, 38 people just found it to be really neat.

I can see it now, Benjamin P. Hardy banned from the Medium Hall of Fame for clapping for his own articles too early and too often.

Jeff Goins testifying in front of congress about how he never made a single fake Medium account to recommend his own article before the clap system was instituted.

We no longer have any idea who the real home run king is — but maybe that’s okay.

Maybe the system helps the next Benjamin P. Hardy or Jeff Goins get the exposure they deserve. Maybe it’s responsible for discovering the next writer who doesn’t give a fuck about the latest trends, doesn’t know what a listicle is and just tells it like they see it.

Or maybe every one who ever wrote anything on Medium will be too busy sharing their two cents on the new applause system or obsessively clapping for their favorite writers post from January, to clap for this article.

Madness I tell you.

Well, while it’s here…go and clap for each and every one of my posts. More than you should, get obnoxious with it. Clap for way longer than the actual art of it all has earned, much like you do at a children’s dance recital.

Use those little virtual hands to make me famous before Medium realizes what an awful mistake they have made and removes them, as if those hands belonged to an American who was caught stealing on his trip to certain parts of Asia.

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