Why I Stand Dead Center

The Idiocracies and irony of being me

Photo by Anthony Tori on Unsplash

I’ve tried to make it clear where I stand politically, culturally, socially and spiritually — even if I’m not always a hundred percent clear on it.

I’m not a Republican, though I’m not a full liberal by any stretch either. I tend to lean democratically when I do vote, though sometimes both candidates are so bad — I just stay home, smoke weed and ponder over how bad they are.

(*cough : 2016 Primary: cough*).

I attended the Bernie rally that was held at Drexel University that year, but mainly because my best friend offered to smoke the quarter ounce of purple haze he had if I went with him. I won’t knock the event, hipsters were peacefully playing hacky-sack and smoking joints the same size as ours.

It was far out, even if it was to the left.

We didn’t stay for the speech I presume Bernie eventually gave, because I mean let’s be honest — politicians are a fucking snooze. Plus in our heart of hearts, as nice as free healthcare for everyone sounded, we knew he wouldn’t win. How could a bleeding heart, boogie down bro like Bernie ever beat a woman who looks like she was the empress of an evil entity in a past life?

While I found the “lock her up” chants comically uncalled for, I didn’t want her…